Free Experiential NPD Checklist
The following information was compiled by Dr. Alff to give words to what you may be experiencing.
People react to perceived rejection in individual ways. When a child is very little, perceived rejection and the person's individualized reaction to it may form the basis of a personality disorder. It is called a personality disorder because the behavior is abnormal:from early adulthood the person could be counted on to act, think, or interact in a way that wasn't normal in general society. Their behaviour can be harmful, embarrassing, and puzzling. It can negatively influence their growth, friendships, and choices throughout their lifetime. Yet the person may be oblivious to their problem and blame others, in spite of constant comments from others, and the pain their behaviour causes others.
The ten specific personality disorders identified in the DSM-IV (American Psychiatric Association: Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fourth Edition. Washington DC, American Psychiatric Association, 1994) are the following: Paranoid, Schizoid, Schizotypal, Antisocial, Borderline, Histrionic, Narcissistic, Avoidant, Dependent, and Obsessive-Compulsive. Specific diagnostic criteria for each personality disorder can be found through online searches.
Note: A person may fulfill symptom criteria for several personality disorders at the same time. Sometimes a person may have features of several personality disorders, with not enough symptoms in any one to have that diagnosis.
Dealing With Narcissistic Persecution from a Christian Perspective
Is there an important person in your life that causes you a great deal of pain?
- Who puts down your needs but unreasonably requires your constant attention to his/her desires
- Who does not take responsibility for his/her own actions but blames you and others for them
- Who makes you feel badly when you are around him/her: ashamed, unable to concentrate, inadequate, confused, angry, frustrated
- Who pulls praise from you, and will praise him/herself, for doing the tasks that you routinely do unnoticed, but he/she will devalue your work
- Who overestimates his/her own self-importance
- Who cannot understand or be sensitive to your feelings, thoughts or experience, even after you have fully explained them
- Who uses others (and you) because he/she expects to be given whatever they want regardless of the cost to others
- Who is arrogant and selfish
- Who inappropriately monopolizes conversations but puts others down for sharing needs
- Who is insensitive as to how his/her comments, and the harsh sound of his/her words, hurt others
- Who is emotionally cold
- Who controls your life in many different ways
- Who causes you to feel as though your personality is changing, and that you are "walking on eggshells"
If you answered "yes" to many of these experiences, you may be dealing with a narcissistic personality disorder (NPD). You might find the following NPD series helpful. You might want to check out the page titled ChristiansExperiencingNarcissism.